The Illusion of Transparency

From Stephanie Vozza on Fast Company:

“Questions can also clarify expectations and make sure everyone is on the same page. Even if you think you understood your colleague or manager, there is a good chance you didn’t, says Grant Halvorson; the problem arises from something psychologists call the “illusion of transparency.”

“Because we know what we are thinking and feeling, and what our intentions are, we assume that it’s obvious to other people, too,” she says. “People think they’ve said more than they did, so there is a good chance you are missing something that may have gone unsaid.”

Resolve this problem by repeating back to the person what you think they said, suggests Grant Halvorson. “Something like, ‘Okay, just to be sure I’ve got the important details . . . ’ This clears up any misunderstandings that may have arisen,” she says.”

The problem with this is if it’s done mechanically it will come over as stilted and artificial. In addition, no one is going to be able to pick up all the context in the other person’s head, it will just take too long. However something along these lines, if done now and again, is probably quite handy. It may even sharpen the useful skill in being able to extract the main points in a conversation (where issues and topics often weave in and out).

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